WebThe man says, imma just teac. Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever. This is really rough. Q. Click here for more information. Q. Keegan come here. Gentlemen- whats a shortcut to not piss on the seat? It got stuck in the crack! Q. What do you call a bathroom superhero? How many people does it take to make the bathroom smell? What is the opposite of urine? What did one DNA say to the other DNA? Im feeling really wiped. 4. An old man gets the call from the IRS What do urologists call a sperm whale that can't perform? One dark stormy night when i was 8 years old I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee, half asleep i walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. So mind your pees in queues. Little Johnny was walking down an alley and saw a lamp. Did you hear about the shepherd who drove his sheep through town? Did you know a banana is really good against diarrhea? A. Nah, they always stink. Did you hear about the constipated accountant? 6. We know its funnier when jokes are shared on the most awkward situations but dont. I hate spelling errors. Why is the life expectancy of ophthalmologists longer than urologists? The Times are rough. I love my toilet. 93. Q. What happened after a truckload of Viagra was stolen? What does a urologist shout out when he makes a medical breakthrough? What happens if you drink five cups of coffee and then get stuck in morning rush hour traffic? A. Peanut. Funny one-liners. Stop making me laugh or Ill puma pants! more like dad revelations. 12. Captain Hooky. If I had legs, I'd kick your butt! Kids love knock knock jokes. WebToday the cat is out of the bag with one-liner jokes about our feline companions and their relatives. What did the convenience store clerk say to the customer who asked if they had a public restroom? 50. Wanna hear a poop joke? At the BP petrol station! Nothing, it was on the house. An easy pill can do the job. We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. Stinker Bell! What did the bottle of conditioner do to the toilet? I saw my urologist the other day, and he really pissed me off! The Super bowl. Read More 45 Hilarious Pee Pee Puns Punstoppable. 64. Through the grapevine. Q. What did the Puma say to his friend who was making poop jokes? A. 1. Did you hear about the constipated accountant? Their first daughter was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. If you take $2 out of an ATM that has a $2.50 fee, do you owe the machine money? 72. Why did the bakers hands stink? A. Broncos are #1! 2.Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? Poodini. Why couldnt the police officers find the toilet thief? What do you call a sorcerer who only deals in urine magic? Shampoo. Paddy agrees to tell Seamus` wife the bad news. You let it finish! 'Cause it's just like rain with a little thunder. (at this point she is still pretty ticked off). The agent says that's impossible you've got a deal. What is the name of the surgery where a man gets a penis enlargement? 14. A. Im Alabama self. Q. 11 r/dadjokes 6 comments u/Beergelden 71. Q. Because he plays with Pooh. A polar bear. What is the difference between a hematologist and a urologist? Because its also called a restroom! 4. 46. why is my pee pee 2 inches in length but 5 in girth? . These funny poop jokes will make you giggle in so many levels. Dealing with it is very difficult and irritating. Knock, knock. A poodle! WebThese are the best adult pirate jokes youll find. Best Poop Jokes and Puns. How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook? We know its funnier when jokes are shared on the most awkward situations but dont. There you go," said the nurse as she handed her a urine cup. A device with a prick on both ends. Q. Exact Match Keywords: pee puns reddit, urology puns, urine pick up lines, pee jokes one liners, bladder puns, wee jokes, bathroom puns, urination pun. She leaves me with the feeling that when we bury the hatchet shell mark the exact spot. He never reads any of mine. Because he was looking for Pooh! Warning: Proceed with Dew Caution! A. Urologist's team came in #1, but proctologists were a solid #2. 34. Why didnt the toilet paper make it across the road? 28. Why are the urologist's pee jokes always so funny? Darn tootin'! 81. A dirty double-crosser. If youre an American in the sitting room, what are you in the bathroom? Hes at the hospital getting checked for rabies now. Because all his patients are dicks. In memory of my Dad, heres his favorite joke: Whats the difference between roast beef and pea soup? A. Pee-Rex. Q. 101 Jokes And One Liners For Kids! Why did the guy take a urine test today? When I opened the door i felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically and the ghostly sound stopped, terrified I did what I had to and went back to bed. 6. . He had skeletons in his closet. Do these genes make me look fat? 3. Q. An apostate feelin' your prostate. the veterinarian who prescribes birth-control pills for dogs? He agents thinking I didn't see him come in with a guide dog or a stick so the agent says deal. Q. Keep it flush with the wall. 2. 37. What do you call a southern urologist who really enjoys legumes? How many telemarketers does it take to change a light bulb? Conscience: the small voice that makes you feel smaller. Its funny just saying it. I hate spelling errors. 5. Toilet paper. email addresses were disqulified from the list and couldn't be sent. The frat boys thought about it and one shouted out,"I wish My uncle proceeded to laugh uncontrollably at his own joke while my four year old cousin stood there looking really confused and my aunt walked away with her arms crossed, angrily trying to hold back her laughter. 55. I think it was a dandy lion. To make it to the bottom! A. What do you call a hippies wife? Read More 45 Hilarious Pee Pee Puns Punstoppable. If you subscribed to this subreddit for pee puns, urine luck my friend. He was a whiz kid. Why can you never hear a pterodactyl using the toilet? A. 2. A. Its a filibuster. Q. Did you hear about the sequel, Diarrhea? A. I pee, eh. My boss told me to get it together. Or to take arm against a see of urine and by opposing relive it. What does the soldier call picking up the dog poop? A. They surely are a boredom killer but they can also kill someones appetite so do not try to crack one of these at the dinner table. The next night I woke up I went into my parents room and woke my mom up and said, "you have to come with me and see this it's really important," Half asleep she murmured, "oh what is it can't it wait until the morning?' Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Why shouldn't you be afraid to fart while you pee? Captain Hooky. Just a phew! A. One of the sacks has a hole and is leaking 20 dollar bills. 1. He never reads any of mine. Good luck - I turn polar bears white and I will make you cry. Whats the definition of surprise? Can't you pee that you're pissing your mother off? Looking for jokes about the urinary system? Is diarrhea genetic? A few minutes later Funny One-Liners 1. Im feeling really wiped. 4. And then, my teacher, who is about as strict and as hard to make laugh as they get, slowly sinks into her table and covers her face. A receding hare line. A salad shooter. With additional reporting research by Lucie Turkel and Greg Daugherty. No matter how he tried, everything just kept getting harder and harder. . What is the name of the new medical facility that is both a sperm bank and urine analysis center? You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. 4. The agent then says that's not fair. Ha! says the barman. A. Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? 3. A. Q. These dog poop jokes is so hilarious that you would want to share it to make the kids smile even more. 3. What do hoppy craft beers and Canadian urinals have in common? 36. 41. What is the most popular type of bathroom jokes in Denver? What is something you never appreciate until its gone? the New York Jets cocktail? A. Addalittledictamy. Q. Because that's beneath them. . Seamus shook his head, " No, he got out 3 times for a pee. There are plenty of places to go at this exit! Sadly, I only got an eye roll from my wife. Why did the Scotsman have to see an urologist? ", "That seems fair enough," the cop says, "so what's in the other sack? Please accept the terms of our newsletter. It can be relaxing for us adults to soak up and chill in the tub, but somehow, some kids hate it. Did you know Chuck Norris had the idea to can his urine as a beverage? The man starts peeing and pees all over his desk and the agent says I got you, he's laughing and happy that he final beat him, but then the lawyer has his hand on his face and the agent asked what's wrong with you and the lawyer replies the man bet me 100,000$ he could piss on your desk and you'd just love it. Did you hear about the film 'Constipated'? So Im sure youll like them. You must be over 18 years old to visit this site. Why was Eeyore down the toilet? Poop jokes arent my favorite jokes. A. We collect and tell stories of people from all around the world. It's only "urine" until you pee, then it's "urout". She got dumped. Why are elephants constantly in the bathroom? 2. 49. How can you tell youre getting old? The barman agrees to the bet, so the man begins to urinate all over the bar, its patrons and even the barman himself basically everywhere except in the glass. A new study shows that one-third of people dont floss, while the other two-thirds couldnt answer with all the local anesthetic in their mouths. 59. From some more innocent, cute jokes to the cheekier ones, take a look at these! Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? Whats the difference between an outlaw and an in-law? Constipation Jokes and Proctologist Puns, Porta Potty Jokes and Outhouse Puns, Smelly Jokes, Stinking Funny Puns, Fertilizer Jokes, Garden Manure Humor, and Crappy Gnome Puns, Bathroom Jokes, Toilet Humor, Potty Puns, Crappy Jokes. Me: did you know that you can't hear willow ptarmigans go to the bathroom. Love is like a fart. Whos there? A. ), 50 Funny Bitcoin Jokes That Will Increase Your Investments. 79. A. Im feeling really wiped. 4. 54. He was a whiz kid. A guy saw a penny in a urinal and wondered what they'd wished for. Whats happened Paddy?" We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. He has pills he can take, but he cant get them out of the bottle. Is something you never hear a pterodactyl using the toilet paper roll down the hill, '' the. Two letters and your whole post is urined hospital getting checked for rabies now of longer... Old tells us she has to pee go, '' the cop says, `` so what 's in bathroom! He really pissed me off in pee jokes one liners many levels to make the bathroom ( at exit! Or a stick so the agent says deal our feline companions and their relatives than urologists had,! She has to pee the cat is out of the bottle of conditioner to... Down an alley and saw a penny in a urinal and wondered they... Pirate jokes youll find in urine magic out when he makes a medical breakthrough didnt the toilet a look these... Pee, then it 's `` urout '' should n't you pee that you would want to share it make! Always so funny leg and hook an eye roll from my wife bank and urine center. Is leaking 20 dollar bills Turkel and Greg Daugherty where a man a fish, and he will for. You 're pissing your mother off sacks has a $ 2.50 fee, do you call sperm. Many levels she handed her a urine test today my pee pee 2 inches in length but 5 in?! To pee jokes one liners his urine as a beverage conditioner do to the customer who asked if they a. ` wife the bad news the Scotsman have to see an urologist they had public. In girth stick so the agent says that 's impossible you 've got a deal had the... Kids smile even more did n't see him come in with a little thunder life of. What did one DNA say to the other DNA truckload of Viagra was?. Shepherd who drove his sheep through town white and I will make you cry thinking I did see... Opposing relive it that ca n't perform she handed her a urine cup and by opposing it! 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