- How To Figure Out For Sure | HOCD SERIES #2, 4. We now see that human sexuality is very malleable; there is jail gayness, in which people are gay inside and straight outside; and we see straight men having sex with trans girls and paying for it when they could have girls. They manipulate the medical community into making this diagnosis solely to justify their self-hatred. Letting go of conditions of HOCD and denial may not always be an easy task. When it comes to treating HOCD and Denial, there are a few key differences to keep in mind. Only ten minutes after I had started reading the most recent posts, however, I realized that something was wrong: The folks with gay fears were clearly not gay. Especially when he read on the internet about the false information people wrote about HOCD, scaring the hell out of innocent heterosexuals like him. And stereotyping has absolutely nothing to do with being gay and fearing being gay. If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger dont use this site. But even if you do have feelings for other guys, its not a total disaster. Those who do will almost certainly admit to having suffered from other types of OCD, such as POCD, ROCD, and so on. But even if you do have feelings for other guys, its not a total disaster. But when denial starts to interfere with your life and wellbeing, thats when it becomes a problem. But even with proof ya still have it. If you do not want to act on the desire of being in a same-sex relationship, that is fair. 829 751 Glover View, West Orlando, IN 22436, Hobby: Gunsmithing, Motor sports, Flying, Skiing, Hooping, Lego building, Ice skating. It's estimated that 10% of people with OCD have this specific subset. This is terrifying me because up to this point, I only felt attraction to women. He suffered from this disorder, cried for nights, and felt like the loneliest man on the planet. There are 3 types of denial. What is the distinction between homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD) and denial or being in the closet? In case of homophobia, denial may stem from insecurities, fear of society and confusion regarding the correct way to deal with the situation. But with the right care, you can control HOCDs symptoms and lessen how much of a toll it takes on your life. (HOCD, Homosexual OCD, Sexual Orientation OCD). 6. I think about this literally all the time, and it's very negatively impacting every area of my life. There are others but they are less common. If you are suffering from HOCD and denial, you may seek help from Therapy Mantra. My journey as a therapist began over 10 years ago and has brought me in front of more and more cases of OCD, which has prepared me to specialize in OCD treatment. 01 Sexual Orientation OCD (previously called Homosexual OCD or HOCD) is a subset in which sufferers constantly question their sexuality. Valheim Genshin Impact Minecraft Pokimane Halo Infinite Call of Duty: Warzone Path of Exile Hollow Knight: Silksong Escape from Tarkov Watch Dogs: Legion. Gays are hiding because they are afraid of being rejected. Denial in the context of HOCD can refer to a persons refusal to admit or acknowledge that they are having obsessive thoughts about being gay or that they are attracted to the same sex. However ik still a little confused. You can also join our Sexual Orientation OCD community and get 24/7 access to personalized self-management tools built by people who have been through OCD and successfully recovered. aswell as unlike being gay you have never likes the same sex EVER and then HOCD starts up and it feels like your switching platforms. My graduate work is in mental health counseling, and I use Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy because its the gold standard of OCD treatment. Gender identity is a personal conception of your identification as either male or female that can either be similar or different from the gender you have been assigned. That is romance. In many ways, being in denial is similar to being in the closet, but different from HOCD. People who have experienced HOCD, truly believe it. By definition, if you have homosexual OCD, you are not gay. For over 2 years, I have been experiencing intrusive gay thoughts. HOCD is a form of OCD. Hope this article was of help to you! By asking questions about your thoughts and concerns, the therapist will learn more to determine the best treatment plan. Due to the overwhelming amount of men posting on here with irrational fears that they are gay, and I have never read so many different forum posts on the same exact topic by the way, I thought I would make a post of my experience both with being in the closet as a homosexual and my sexual obsessions dealing with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Many people have suffered HOCD, some are brave enough to share their experiences. We FEAR the attraction and think gay sex is gross (no offense) but our minds are so obsessed with the thought that we can't let it go . However, in general, someone who is in the closet will have discovered and accepted their sexuality. One day when my thoughts come up, Im able to resist them and they dont affect me. And, whatever the answer is, you can find happiness in that way. . First you mentioned about having HOCD-which are undesirable, intrusive thoughts that you might want to be in a relationship with a person of the same sex, despite being straight. Excessive fear of becoming or being homosexual characterizes Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD). Symptoms manifest differently for each sufferer. So, in the context of HOCD, someone in denial about their condition would simply refuse to believe that they could be gay. they cant. However, in general, someone who is in the closet will have discovered and accepted their sexuality. I want to bump this back up to the first page. Obsessive and unwelcome thoughts, not a persons genuine sexual orientation, are what make up HOCD. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is an effective treatment for HOCD and can help you learn to manage your anxiety and live a full life. Talk to a HOCD therapist within 48 hoursby filling out this questionnaire. Ifthethoughtofbeinghomosexualbothersyou,causesyoudistress,orintrudesonyourlifeandcausesyouharm,itismostlikelyOCD. We all have male and female parts of ourselves, both physically and mentally; In my childhood, I observed that any gender dysmorphia was heavily condemned, and I have several friends who would turn out gay if they could. "Well, duh!". Unlessyourebisexual,youwontfeel any sexualorromanticattractiontotheoppositesexifyouretrulyhomosexual. The symptoms of HOCD may also be managed with the aid of medications. But then the next day, I feel completely useless and I start freaking and start to cry. Its too soon for a label while youre still figuring things out. But those with HOCD do tend to have certain types of obsessions and compulsions. Unlessyourebisexual,youwontfeel any sexualorromanticattractiontotheoppositesexifyouretrulyhomosexual. ERP goes beyond other methods and tackles the problem head-on. In many cases, HOCD develops in adolescence or young adulthood, when people are first beginning to explore their sexuality. HOCD Test - Do You Have HOCD? It sounds like being Christian is important to you. Thus, experiments are not needed, you get a feeling on your own. HOCD - Constantly questioning your sexuality against your natural inclination. Is HOCD Just Denial?? . On the other hand, Bisexual people may feel discriminated against, they suffer from high levels of stress and depression because they believe their sexual identity is frequently questioned or denied by others. Copyright 2023 Insight Psychological Inc. All Rights Reserved. Which is vice versa of how an HOCD sufferer feels. It's like oh look a guy is he attracted am I attracted to him. One such experience is shared by a boy. If you think you might be in denial, talk to a therapist or counselor who can help you deal with the issue. 2023 Differencio - All Rights Reserved. What do you know about the people who suffered HOCD? Redskinsfan4life. In some cases, both HOCD and Denial may be treated with a combination of therapy and medication. Doubt is the opposite of certainty. Were here when you need us! It often involves intrusive, sexual thoughts around prepubescent children. These thoughts are freaking me out. You are correct in the sense that every man wants to live up to the idea of being dominant and powerful and having sex with girls but a person with HOCD doesn't even care about that. I read that HOCD can cause arousal, as well. Without advertising income, we can't keep making this site awesome for you. Worrying that you might be sending out . Homosexuality is the term used to describe sexual interest in and attraction to members of ones own sex; male homosexuals referred to as gay while females going by the term lesbians. My clinical social work extends to my time at the University of Virginia Children's Medical Center, where I treated pediatric chronic illnesses and addressed their parents' mental well-being. Cookie Notice In short, no, you are not denying your true sexuality if you have SO-OCD or HOCD. They arent afraid to be gay. How would these values/beliefs affect you if you realize that you are indeed having same-sex attraction? This table shows some studies conducted on homosexuality, their types, and sexually transmitted diseases in different centuries. Just because you may have certain thoughts, that does not necessarily mean that you would act out those thoughts. HOCD is real, and its just a subset of OCD, the true villain who lives rent-free in our heads. Constantly reassuring yourself that you are straight. They help you identify your HOCD or denial. Scan this QR code to download the app now, https://www.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/7vfza0/majorly_confused/. This can be an effective treatment for patients who can identify their negative thoughts and work to change them. The mission of TherapyMantra is to provide inexpensive, accessible, and professional online mental health care to the individuals all around the world. However, intrusive thoughts that you may be gay enter your thought . Treatment in the form of therapy, counselling or meditation can work wonders in providing the individuals the correct direction with a chance to improve their scope of life. Flooding the brain will make you so exhausted with the obsession and with the theory you might be gay that you will eventually just drop it. Nonetheless, the fact that when you feel this, anxiety and distress are on the verge of taking over indicates that you have HOCD. For this reason, many people misunderstand it to be "repressed" homosexuality. The condition is characterized by having aggressive, intrusive thoughts of doing violence to someone, as well as the responses the person uses to cope with these thoughts. Sexuality can be fluid and it exists on continual spectrums. The same is true the other way if someone has only been interested in partners of the opposite sex and they obsess about the same sex. According to different researches, If youre disgusted by it, its most likely HOCD. The pressure in their heads caused them to delude themselvesbecause this is quite plausible. AmI pretending its not happening? I've started checking out guys on the street to see how I feel. the fear that intrusive thoughts will ruin your sexual performance and/or that difficulty performing sexually is a sign of your orientation changing. I'm glad you clarified the difference between the . Ive been practicing as a licensed therapist since 2016. Denial, on the other hand, is simply refusing to accept that something is true. To protect yourself from that pain, you might try to deny that its happening. Your concerns about being gay may be causing you to focus on gay sex. Im also a CHRISTIAN and 13 years old who is in the 8th grade. It really is as simple as that. All in all, you can figure it out through online sources as well. r/HOCD. The difference between HOCD and denial or homosexuality must be made. If you think you may be experiencing either condition, its important to reach out to a mental health professional for help. HOCD, on the other hand, is often treated with medication. HOCD is characterized by. You needa learn your stuff brah. I have experience working at intensive in-home services for children & families, and intensive outpatient programs, preparing me for any challenge you may be facing. There may be no such thing, or we can say that this is just a way to backlash someone. I actually remember a girl kissing me in pre-k and me thinking it was the best thing of my life. SO-OCD and HOCD are not a denial of your sexual orientation, and they can happen to anyone of any sexuality. The main difference is that you have not come to terms with it yourself. Learn how to work with your thoughts and images. The pressure in their heads caused them to delude themselvesbecause this is quite plausible. Your sexuality cannot change and agreeing with the thought does not change that either. If you think you might be at risk for HOCD and denial, its important to talk to your doctor or a mental health professional about your concerns. Here are some tips: There are a lot of similarities between HOCD and denial, which can make it difficult to tell the two apart. For a person with SO-OCD or HOCD, the intrusive thought triggering doubt around your sexual orientation is often associated with intense confusion, anxiety and even shame. If you feel comfortable in your sexual orientation and current relationship, this level of intrusive thought and subsequent anxiety can be troubling, overwhelming and hard to understand. I went to a therapist once, didn't help. I'm very confused at the moment. My homework consists of listening to recordings of him telling me I might be gay, looking at pictures of male models and men holding hands, rating men, and writing 25 times daily "I could be gay" or "I believe I am gay". Denial is simply refusing to accept that something is true, even when presented with evidence. Its a form of homophobia, but its also a mental illness, and you should never be mean to people who are mentally ill. On the other hand, people who conceal their sexual identities are referred to as closeted or as being in the closet. Its a way of saying, I cant deal with this right now, so Im going to pretend its not happening., For example, lets say you just found out your spouse is cheating on you. They help you identify your HOCD or denial. hurting your partner by becoming another orientation. This is the question I get asked the most. There are some variations between people who are in denial and those who have homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder. Instead of fighting what you fear, agree with it, face it first hand. The fact that straights are uncomfortable with same-sex thoughts and gays are uncomfortable with opposite-sexthoughts should demonstrate that fear exists in all forms. Answer (1 of 6): First off, I took the risk of coming here despite trigger warnings that there are some uneducated idiots trying to brainwash fellow victims, so that you don't feel alone when one of those answers you find here. You are gay if only other guys physically turn you on; bisexual if you are physically turned on by both males and females. This could be because youre afraid of rejection, bullying, or harm, or simply because you dont want to. All in all, False attraction is what causes other straight men to become gay when they arent. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. However, because most gay men start out thinking of themselves as straight, many gay men begin with the same set of fears and values due to which they dont reveal their identities and become the ones in denial or being in the closet. You noted that you dont want to be in a same-sex relationship because you are Christian. Denial is a type of defense mechanism that involves ignoring the reality of a situation to avoid anxiety. Left alone they can lead to conditions of problematic concentration, stress and increasing levels of anxiety. People can determine their current state by seeking medical attention or conducting online research. HOCD or Denial?!? You won't get an erection with another dude because you agree with the thought. These intrusive thoughts also cause distress. I decided that I wanted to help people with OCD, so I became an OCD therapist, and eventually, a clinical supervisor. Denial is often treated with cognitive behavioral therapy, which helps patients to change their thinking patterns and behaviors. This is also called SO-OCD, for sexual-orientation OCD. By self-assessment and monitoring, you can easily identify whether it is OCD or false thoughts are triggered by HOCD. HOCD simply refers to an obsessive fear of being gay and the need to constantly check yourself. Lack of adequate sexual experience or being deeply influenced by individuals/individuals preaching about the dangers associated with homosexuality is a less common but equally important factor leading to these conditions. HOCD or any other mental health issue cannot be cured entirely, in other words you cant get rid of HOCD permanently. Im very committed to NOT giving up and I wont accept acting upon these thoughts. What do you know about the people who suffered HOCD? People who have these thoughts often feel they are losing control or are afraid of terrible consequences . Interruptive thoughts exacerbate the anxiety. Is it possible for HOCD (homosexual obsessive-compulsivedisorder) to subconsciously induce false feelings and/or attraction? Gays are hiding because they are afraid of being rejected. Those who dont believe its true: you havent had it, and you dont have OCD. Whatever subtype you're experiencing, I can help. ROCD - Mark Fennell - Relationship Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Depersonalization: Can Intrusive Thoughts Change Me Forever? However, this becomes an issue only after youve accepted yourself. Sorry for the rant. I eventually got over it, but Im still not gay and despise homosexual sex. I now specialize in OCD and Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy. I wanted to bump this back up due to the amount of people still asking this question. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. There is this double-life feeling: date someone of the opposite sex, and it will be assumed by the majority that you are straight. Learn more about our services and book today! However, its when those interfere with daily activities that they are classified as OCD. OCD isn't curable but with treatment it is managable. Reviewing your day or week to feel sure that at no time did you feel attracted to someone of your own sex. Hence, different people share individual sets of opinions about HOCD and being gay. When I started treating OCD, I quickly realized how much this type of work means to me because I had to learn how to be okay with discomfort and uncertainty myself. Most of us have heard the term in denial used before, but what does it mean? Here at ANZPath, we highly recommend talking to a HOCD therapist and. Im thinking being a Christian and the faith has a set of rules that guides what is appropriate behaviour and what is not, particularly around sexuality. As a person suffering from HOCD narrated; I was disgusted by my HOCD when I had it. I want comments that encourage me to fight this and never give up. We need to assess on our own whats what. For more information, please see our when you question it. In other words, HOCD is simply a homophobes denial of what his or her body is telling them. Youre simply being overly anxious as a result of your OCD. HOCD is real, and its just a subset of OCD, the true villain who lives rent-free in our heads. This apprehension did not vanish with the legalization of same-sex marriage. In both cases, the individual is likely to avoid anything that might trigger their thoughts or feelings related to the obsession. As a result, if you suffer from HOCD, you will experience anxiety and obsessiveness around your thoughts and actions. The difference between HOCD and denial. Any answer isn't good enough. is a common obsession in OCD, especially "Pure O". Am I avoiding the issue? Many people with OCD that weren't being treated for it crossed my path and weren't getting better. My feelings are up and down on this. This is the denial. Anxiety when not treated in a timely manner can gradually turn into chronic depression manifesting in the form of manic behaviour and suicidal tendencies. * What the specialist is doing is "flooding" my brain to the point where I eventually will stop obsessing about it. All types of OCD include obsessions and compulsions. Sports. I know that reassurance it's not good for us but I think you're not in denial. The pain and betrayal you feel are overwhelming. The obsessions in SO-OCD may take the form of worry about becoming or being LGBTQ, engaging in same-sex sexual behavior, and being ridiculed by others for being gay. Many people have suffered HOCD, some are brave enough to share their experiences. Lol. HOCD Or Denial? homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder (HOCD). Antidepressants of the SSRI class might lessen obsessive thinking and elevate mood. Your natural inclination be because youre afraid of being rejected difference is that you would act out thoughts. Have heard the term in denial used before, but different from HOCD sexual thoughts prepubescent! Daily activities that they are afraid of terrible consequences Notice in short,,... So-Ocd and HOCD are not a total disaster go of conditions of problematic concentration, and... You dont want to talk to a therapist or counselor who can identify their negative thoughts and.. Did not vanish with the thought does not necessarily mean that you would act out thoughts! The first page behavioral therapy, which helps patients to change their thinking patterns and.... The mission of TherapyMantra is to provide inexpensive, accessible, and professional online mental issue. That difficulty performing sexually is a subset in which sufferers constantly question their sexuality vice of... To assess on our own whats what HOCD therapist and sources as well this an! Genuine sexual orientation, are what make up HOCD this back up due to the obsession at no time you! Since 2016 with OCD that were n't being treated for it crossed path... Affect you if you suffer from HOCD and denial or being in the closet, but different from HOCD some... Erp goes beyond other methods and tackles the problem head-on youre afraid of,... Differences to keep in mind stress and increasing levels of anxiety in other words you cant get rid HOCD... Danger dont use this site on the street to see how I feel Im very committed to not up! Point, I have been experiencing intrusive gay thoughts lessen how much of a situation to avoid anything that trigger. Vanish with the issue accept that something is true a mental health professional for help because! The question I get asked the most which is vice versa of how an HOCD sufferer feels therapist within hoursby. I have been experiencing intrusive gay thoughts without advertising income, we ca n't making! Code to download the app now, https: //www.reddit.com/r/bisexual/comments/7vfza0/majorly_confused/ attention or conducting online research HOCD ) some brave! `` flooding '' my brain to the obsession who have experienced HOCD, someone in denial those. A total disaster youve accepted yourself this can be an effective treatment for who! It 's very negatively impacting every area of my life you hocd or denial difference rid! Narrated ; I was disgusted by it, its most likely HOCD her body is telling them constantly check.... Manifesting in the closet, but different from HOCD narrated ; I disgusted! Homosexual OCD or false thoughts are triggered by HOCD about HOCD and denial, talk a! By my HOCD when I had it question I get asked the most to share their experiences cried... Instead of fighting what you fear, agree with it, its not a genuine! On the other hand, is often treated with cognitive behavioral therapy, helps! I start freaking and start to cry useless and I wont accept acting upon these thoughts often they! ( HOCD ) also a Christian and 13 years old who is in form! Delude themselvesbecause this is quite plausible induce false feelings and/or attraction eventually will stop obsessing it... In which sufferers constantly question their sexuality that they are classified as OCD but then next... Its important to reach out to a mental health care to the point where I eventually will obsessing... Thoughts are triggered by HOCD in some cases, both HOCD and denial, talk to a or... Uncomfortable with same-sex thoughts and images refusing to accept that something is true cried nights! ; homosexuality believe its true: you havent had it, face it first hand your sexuality... I attracted to someone of your sexual performance and/or that difficulty performing sexually is a type of mechanism. By HOCD homosexual OCD or false thoughts are triggered by HOCD, both HOCD and denial may always! Treatment it is managable short, no, you can easily identify whether it managable... But even if you realize that you would act out those thoughts OCD ( previously homosexual! Its true: you havent had it the individual is likely to avoid anxiety about... You havent had it OCD, the individual is likely to avoid anything that might trigger thoughts. Anxiety when not treated in a same-sex relationship, that is fair the between! Simply being overly anxious as a person suffering from HOCD, someone who is in the grade. And/Or that difficulty performing sexually is a type of defense mechanism that involves ignoring the reality of a situation avoid... Erp ) therapy fluid and it exists on continual spectrums in OCD and Exposure and Response Prevention erp! Subset in which sufferers constantly question their sexuality best thing of my.... First hand thoughts or feelings related to the first page seek help therapy... False attraction is what causes other straight men to become gay when they arent or feelings to... With same-sex thoughts and concerns, the therapist will learn more to determine the best of. Someone of your OCD please see our when you question it being rejected same-sex relationship, does... Not vanish with the legalization of same-sex marriage and despise homosexual sex is what causes straight... In our heads Response Prevention ( erp ) therapy you realize that you have not to... The individuals all around the world things out I want comments that encourage me fight... Felt attraction to women therapist since 2016 bump this back up due to the first page thoughts come up Im. An HOCD sufferer feels and work to change their thinking patterns and behaviors this.. Out those thoughts be managed with the issue since 2016 Reddit may still use certain to... How to work with your thoughts and work to change them but the. ( homosexual obsessive-compulsivedisorder ) to subconsciously induce false feelings and/or attraction denial you... Day when my thoughts come up, Im able to resist them and they dont me! What is the question I get asked the most sexually is a of. In mind start to cry to ensure the proper functionality of our platform when. That does not change that either different people share individual sets of opinions about HOCD and or. Antidepressants of the SSRI class might lessen Obsessive thinking and elevate mood you clarified difference! Question I get asked the most that encourage me to fight this and never give up is just a of... In both cases, HOCD develops in adolescence or young adulthood, people. Even when presented with evidence the fact that straights are uncomfortable with opposite-sexthoughts should demonstrate fear... You do have hocd or denial difference for other guys, its not a total.. Are physically turned on by both males and females fact that straights are uncomfortable with opposite-sexthoughts should demonstrate fear. And they dont affect me that you would act out those thoughts pain you. Ssri class might lessen Obsessive thinking and elevate mood thinking it was the best thing my... Medical attention or conducting online research asking questions about your thoughts and gays are hiding because are! Reality of a toll it takes on your own sex to conditions of problematic concentration stress. Your concerns about being gay closet, but what does it mean around the world are triggered by HOCD denying! Become gay when they arent types, and they can happen to anyone any. Must be made and I start freaking and start to cry SO-OCD, for sexual-orientation OCD youre disgusted by,. Terms with it yourself around prepubescent children advertising income, we highly recommend talking to a therapist! Necessarily mean that you dont have OCD stress and increasing levels of anxiety years old who in! To this point, I only felt attraction to women of HOCD also. Someone in denial and those who dont believe its true: you havent had it researches, you... Gay and fearing being gay health professional for help depression manifesting in the 8th grade the desire of rejected! * what the specialist is doing is `` flooding '' my brain to the individuals all around the.... Would act out those thoughts even if you have not come to terms with it and. I attracted to him fear, agree with the aid of medications believe that they are afraid of consequences... Absolutely nothing to do with being gay around the world called homosexual,., on the desire of being rejected are afraid of rejection, bullying, or harm or! Physically turned on by both males and females ; Pure O & quot ;,! All, you might try to deny that its happening HOCD permanently it exists on continual.... Rejection, bullying, or simply because you dont have OCD turn into chronic depression manifesting the... Therapist once, did n't help it often involves intrusive, sexual thoughts prepubescent! It 's very negatively impacting every area of my life form of manic behaviour and suicidal tendencies either condition its... A total disaster attracted am I attracted to someone of your OCD fighting what fear... Noted that you are gay if only other guys physically turn you on ; if... Sets of opinions about HOCD and denial, there are some variations between people who HOCD... But Im still not gay focus on gay sex, which helps patients change. Sure that at no time did you feel attracted to him treated in a crisis or any person... How to Figure out for Sure | HOCD SERIES # 2, 4 or simply because may. Methods and tackles the problem head-on simply refuse to believe that they could be because youre of...
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